im baaaaaaaaaaaaack !

so out of my deep distress with this hectic life of mine, i decided to finish my navy path ! yepp, im going to go head and enlist in the navyyy .

haha , im more focused now and i figure why not . im starting a partial liquid diet today and its gonna be hell . im ready tho ! i feel like theres a point where i have to let go of all the bullshit im used to and get down to the nitty gritty .

$$$ isnt looking like i want it to and it hurts bc im used to having money and everything else i want, but i believe God is showing me that everything in life isnt gunna be as easy as my mama and everyone else around me has made it seem .

im suchh an open book right now . i might be pregnant and that reality sucks . not saying i dnt ever want a child, but right now isnt the right time :-/

i miss how easy things used to be, but its really crunch time now.


-essence .

losing it .

im losing everything i want . but i guess everything will fall into place when it needs to .

smh .



-essence .

arguments, aggh .

SO all the shit i knew would become stressful came to a head in the last couple dayss . me and vendo had our first argument and me and my mama had another argument out of our many .

january is gunna bring A LOT of mixed feelings and unshared emotions when it comes down to me and vendo's relationship and the overall outcome of it . im scared . i care about him deeply and it seems that every time i turn around these stupid ass exes of his or females who 'like' him have some kind of supposed dirt to put on my name . i hate that shit . it makes me feel as though i have to fight the world to be with him--and that just might be the case . hell, idk . i care so much about him, but i feel as though i might NEVER be 'girlfriend' and im trying not to tell myself not to be so stuck on a title because titles are what kills the best of relationships....hmm . idk . he's so secretive with his emotions it sometimes scares me .

my mama is starting to bxtch...and its not bc she's tryna be spiteful, its because she's gunna miss me so much when i leave ......i see her ! she thinks i dnt see the truth but i do . and this awkward strain is doing nothing to help me try to get thru these next two monthes here . hmmm .

so much on my mind, and so little time to clear it up . God please show me the way .

-essence .

cold outside .

its cold outside

but on the inside— you give me

the warmest

the calmest

feeling i should never have

i dnt deserve you but yet i have you

and as i stare up at you

moon reflecting in your eyes

all i see is magic

magically putting me in a rapture

the words smoothly slip off my tongue

and my tongue connect with yours

and what else can God have in store ?

bc i desperately need to know

what did i do to deserve

your kisses

your touch

the way you look at me

the intimacy

the honesty

the you

the me

and now the WE .

halloween O9 .

so halloween was fuuun . me and my sister/bff myka wen tot statesboro to hit up some parties and shit...but OF COURSE some kinda drama had to pop off .

so when i went to statesboro i almost fought myka's ex's new gf...so this time i was wid myka and she made it a point to come to where we was staying with three fat bxtchz who myka bout cussed out and we made an amazing, classy exit that fckd things up with her ex and his new gf and made him look bad .

but overall it was greeeaaat . i missed luvendo the whoel time tho....but here's some pics !







-essence .

RETHINKING EVERYTHING .

stingy about my life .

so luvendo is amazing . we spend a lot of time together, but we had a discussion last night about making it official, and for the first time--im not the one thats not ready....wow . i have to respect his honesty, but im not going to lie and say that im not a tad bit hurt by it, because i wouldnt do anything to hurt him . i mean, its been a month and i cnt believe how close we are . haha . arguing like a old married couple...i can see us being that, but he doesnt like to talkk about possbilities bc he doesnt want it to fall apart and it never happes...i guess i understand where he's coming from...

but today, we had one of the realest conversations......about having children . it was me, him, and his best friend henry . and all of us admitted to wanting a child now to see what it would be like, but we also agreed we werent ready . i based my readiness on selfishness...because im always on the go and a child would end that . henry based his on the fact that he wanted to get his party on before all that happened...haha . but to my deep surprise luvendo based his on sincere love . he said he didnt need a child right now because he could be the best father with his feet more stably on the ground...he also said that he didnt want to deprive his child or children bc he was . this simple explanation mad me look at him totally differently....

i wont lie and say the whole time e've been spending time i've never thought about having children with him, because i do that with every male i've been with...but when i thought about it regarding him, i thought about it more than just how my child would look or superficial entities...i actually thought about how his parenting would affect the child...and if God crossed or paths to have a child then i'd gladly fufill destiny.

im not jumping to conclusions too soon, im just sayn. God sent him for a reason-- and my curiosity wants to know why .


-essence .

luvendo .

i met this guy...now how many times have i started a post like this.....lets switch it up...


SO I MET AMAZING and i feel like he's extra special. i dnt really know how God expects us to know who is the ONE for us, but i feel like this is it and genuinely he is NOT like ANY other man i've met . i call him a man bc he definitely act like one . haha :) keeps me smiling and i LOOOOVE his mommy . she's absolutely adorable .

see, at first i wasnt write about him till it got like amonth in, but after meeting his lovely mother last night, i HAVE to . yes, his name is LUVENDO and i have never met ANYONE named luvendo . weird as it seems, i love his name, and i think he's the one .

the ONE . just bc i think he's the one doesnt mean he is . i mean, the signs of me being able to marry this man are PREVALENT . we've spent nights together--sexless nighta that were all the while AHH-MAZING . so, i can definitely see our future together. my conscience isnt dirty and i feel like i have a blessing in disguise with him . idk.


only time will tell :-)



essence .

love [original poem]

and as i lay and think
of you--of me
i see
that everything isnt as it seems
they seeyou as some kind of bad seed
not seeingthe beauty of life you've brought to me
although im alone
i must admit
everything we went through--
me and you--
was completely worth it
them night we sneaked--
got caught-
-and still creeped
are tattooed in my memories
those silent but honest stares
holding my heart
i knew you cared
but now our lives
so seperate--
so far
are void--
of crazy nights with the police
and riding around listlessly--
void of me loving you
not saying i dont--cuz it was all tru
the innocence we shared--
or rather i took
that hair filled with strength
thoses eyes with lusty looks
so to finish it off--
here i am alone
still loving you, and trying to be strong .


-essence .

love songs .

lately i been listening to a lot of love songs . easy to say that i do kinda miss having a significant other . being single is fun but its very LONELY . hmm . been having the future on my mind a lot...marriage included, but they wayy it looks now imma be one them ppl who get married real old like .

ughh. just sayn . im not ugly .


-essence .

i almost died .

soo i got my tonsils taken out on augusta 17tth and i fely hotrrible all last week and on tuesday after taking some pain meds i threw up---BLOOD . so my mama took me to the emergency room and i was sittn in there for 45 mins waiting...spitting up blood all the while until i have this feeling take over my throat like im gunna throw up everything i ate in the last ten years. so i get the nurse's attention and she says that the doctor will be with me "ina few moments" --well obviously i didnt have a few moments cuz right then i threw up tissue and large clots of blood .

they finally brought a wheelchair and took me back into the patient area so that they could get me on the bed and get my vitals and everything . the whole i time i feel as if i'm going to die . my mama had stepped out to get some fresh air so all this happened when i was lonesome....very much so . i felt as though i was on the brink of death .

i kept throwing up blood clots all the way up until my mama was located and came where i was breathing hard and long as if she was panicking herself--i think she was . sooo im still heeving away and finally the throwing up stops and now its just spitting . im spitting the blood out of my outh as the nurses try to find a vein and get some blood . i mean, there was a bucket full of blood i had thrown up right in front of me and they could've just scooped some outta there, but noooooo . they had to get it it from one of my tiney veins . i know this because everytime it came to finding a vein to draw blood from, it was difficult...even when i donated at skool....even when i just wentt o the doctor to get tested...so i KNEW that they were'nt gunna find a good vein . they tried for about an hour to find a vein until one of the nurses decided they would have to do an ABG .

for those who arent familiar with healthcare lingo, an ABG is when they get blood directly from your artery . its painful and the only thing that kept my mind off the pain wasn't my mama'snervous voice, or the doctor tlking about what went wrong with my tonsilectomy, but the ONLY thing that kept my mind off the pain was the realization that I COULD DIE . if i threw up too much blood, then a R.I.P could be in order and i'm a lover and a fighter. i wasnt gunna just die . i was afraid...im not gunna sit here and say i wasnt cuz i was . very much so .

so after they finally got the blood the doctor told me they would have o go back into my throat at cauterixe the stubs that used to be my tonsils so that the bleeding would stop.....


to make a long story shorter, they did it and im alive . i wrote =this just to let everyone who takes the time to read this knw, that if i NEVER cherished my life before...i TRULY CHERISH it now....i suggest you do the sme .


-essence .

i have a feeling this post is gunna be a lil longg so BARE WITH ME . omfg.

so lately, my mama has made me realize three things:

--just cuz she's yur mama dnt mean that yu can trust everything she says
ELABORATION: i am my mama's ONLY fckn child and i am now grown so i figure that she could be honest with me and i could be honest with her....nope. she is still stck on that petty 'im yur mama not yur friend' shit . but what she doesnt realize is SHE IS NO LONGER RAISING ME . in reality, as children, our parents sop raising us as soon as we gain our own thoughts, ideas, and mannerisms....i can say my thoughts and opinios bcame truly formed when i was 17 . sooo she doesnt really realize that idk . sooo she lies to me and i know it, but i dnt mind...but when it comes to medical shit, i really do care ! thats my mama ! sooo she lied about a medical something that i dnt wanna discuss that coulda possible been life threatening . what would it look like if something woulda happened and im mal-informed...ugh .


--there's only one person you can truly trust with situations--YOURSELF.
ELABORATION: my mama doesnt undertsand that I DNT FEEL LIKE I NEED TO LIE ABOUT SHIT ANYMORE...why ? im grown . the only people i fear at this point is the police....i cnt get grounded...she cnt whoop me....so what ?! what do i have to fear from telling my mama the truth about everything . i have nothing to loose but everything to gain .



--sometimes you cant please the person you should want to please the most .
ELABORATION : im tired of tryna please her . she's VERY hard to please and i feel if i continue to just try to please her then i wont please myself in the end.


so prayy fro me ! ohh and im gettn my tonsils taken out monday .

--essence .

gettn grown .

sooo lately i been meeting a lot of new ppl and shit, realizing there's definitley life beyond high school.

i mean when yu in high school yur eyes are sort of shaded and shitt...so its great being grown and seein past all that bullshit .

sooo yeahh . got a new tatt .
http://twitpic.com/d2q9a [click there to see it]


yepp so i been doingg my thangg . looking for another job....jc penney is overrated .

love me .

-essence .

my sidekick :)

so here's my info "

TMAIL >>> missconceitedd@tmail.com

GMAIL>>> missconceitedd@gmail.com

yahoo messenger>>> gawgapeach

omfgg !

soooo i went to see my recruiter on monday && i LOST AN INCH !!! yess ! im soo excited about that. soo just 2 more to go now ppl ! hellyesss !

so i found a great wayy to achieve this...im gunna be sauna sweating ! im wrapping my stomack with serran wrap [which targets direct fat] && im sittn in there for 20 minutes a dayy . so yeahh that should also help with my diet && my excercise routine...im mean, it should COMPLEMENT it. yeahh .

and as far as my mama && my decision to go into the navy, she's 100 percent behind me which makes me wanna go forward with this even more. im her only child && even tho she can really piss me off soooo bad, i still want her to be PROUD of her one and only. so yeaah .

&& im starting to shee my stomach tighten && shrinnk ! its greaat .


-essence.

wake me up when september ends .

im listening to the song so thats why i wantrd it as my title * && bc it has so much meaning behind it...ohh the lyrics describe the part of my life im going thru now...
"here comes the rain againfalling from the starsdrenched in my pain againbecoming whowe areas my memory restsbut never forgets what I lostwake me up when September endssummer has come and passedthe innocent can never lastwake me up when September endsring out the bells againlike we did when spring beganwake me up when September ends"

so yeahh ; but basically for an UPDATE . I LOST AN INCH !!!!! yeeppp ! && finally me && my mama are on the same damn page about everything coming up in my life ! i cnt wait to go into the navy really...like i feel like i need something to turn my life around.

not neccessarily CHANGE it but turn it around so that i can have FULL control of everything ; right now i just feel like im floating out here with nothing to really 'live for' . cccrrrrraaazzzyyy .

haha . i miss a certain somebody who i really care about--but my best friend [tanisha] told me "i deserve better" . but i know what my heart feels && i feel like no one really knows what i deserve. hell, i deserve to be HAPPY .

period .


-essence .

well i took my ASVAB todayy && i did veeeerrrry well ; now all i have to do is lose weight--ugh, but i knew that . not even WEIGHT ; more like 4 inches in my waist && 2 off my hips...yepp.

its funnt how much 4 inches means to me right now...imma be hitting up the gym like a excercise addict the next couple weeks....then i'll be reeeaaaaddddy ! yay .

my mama has made me hit thee fckn roof todayy--tired of her shit &&b once again i wanna LEAVE . but imma hold out till i sign my contraact in august :))


-essence ,

my life is moving .

so0ooo-- i went to see my recruiter man todayy && i take the big ASVAB on thursdayy . im pretty excited && just talking to my cheif sergent got me ready to get the fck outta GA && the south in general .

gotta get outta this sudden pause . mannnnn, it feels like im inthe same spot i was 3 months ago ; ugh . so0 annoyiing, but i guess progress is sometimes sloooow .

but life will go on ; as far as the relationship tip--i doubt i will have one for a loooong time . i want one person that i cnt have && for that reason, i dnt want ANYONE else . period.


-essence.

this piping silence . [original poem]

i sit here begging my conscience for a drink
so i cant think
about this
about YOU--true..
you weren't completely mine
but in time maybe
maybe we would be--
thats all i came up with in this
PIPING loud silence
shut up silence !
stop telling me what i already know
i know--i love him .
is that so much ?
no--the silence is still so loud
im begging my conscience again
for a smoke
for a drink
so i can't think--
about this overwhelmingly loud silence
stop silence !
i already know im lonely .

-essence .

whats wrong with me.

i dont deserve to be happy? fr once or twice .
am i too...imperfect for LOVE--FOR ANYTHING?
am i just a reject. why ?
am i not pretty enough--or do i not smile enough ?
AM I NOT ENOUGH ?
what is enough .
i just lost something close to my heart ;
how can i show God that...there's nothing wrng wid me ?



-essence.

becky ?

wtf plies ?

so i guess 'becky' is the new name for heaad ; hahaha ! wow....well damn gucci .
&& when yu thought plies wouldnt get any nastier...he tlks about gettn 'becky'...haha , personally i think its funny && i love gettn becky...wait...i gotta name it sumn else cuz i dnt know anybody named beckyy....o0o0o gettn that 'plies'...haha !


so bxtchz, when yall get head yall gettn that 'plies'.

TRUU !

-essence .

s t r e s s .

im actually stressed beyond relief ;

i almost got firedd yesterdayy for some bullshit that i believe was an uneccessary reason to fire someone, but im glad i still have my job . [which im fed up with alreadyy .] im currently scouting for another one !

with higher pay...yes !

i need to getg away from augusta . so regardless ; im gunna find a way out . even if that means STUDENT LOANS .

a lot of people would be like ' thats not a great idea' . but in depreation, things that could possible be bad look GREAT ,

ugh . so yes, i will be dipset [aaron gaines] by september hopefullyy .

im applying at clayton state so hopefully that'll come thru or i'll get into UAH :))

so yeahh, stress makes the brain go into desperation .

so today im 18.

im extremely relieved to finally be legal so i can stop break laws :)) like the faggot ass curfew augusta got that i absolutely NEVER followed .

now i can legally buy my damn blacks && blunt shells...GREAT . soim supposed to be going out tonight for dessert wid my homegirrrl . yupyup. so many clubs i can go to now :))

so overall this is a happy day for me. just chilling or whatever. no work till wednesday && im happy about it .

*makes me feel super naughty .

i could barely watch !

-essence.

me facts :

--i strive to be as open minded as possible .
--when i fall out wid people i wish that their karma gets fckdd up .
--im a sexual person ; not neccessarily a freak .
--bxtchz love to come up with stuff about me ; i think its funny to hear the stories .
--i believe im destinied to be famous .
--my mama is the one person i could kill && kill for .
--everything i do is for my own independence .
--i think rockers are cooler than most rappers [except weezy .]
--i try not to jusge peole before i get to know them, but sometimes i have no choice .
--i'd love to fck the shit outta plies :)
--i had a dream that i was gunna marry soulja boy .
--been arrested 2 times .
--bxtchz say im unladylike . i wanna know what the definition of that is..
--my daddy made me have trust issues .
--im a tadd bi . haha ...more than a tad .
--i'd rather kiss a bxtch && fck a nigga .
--when i see a sexy nigga i get wet INSTANTLY .
--most bxtchz who dnt like me will never approach me .
--i despise like 80% of the people at my church bc of their ignorance .
--i want sleeves . [of tatts]
--im cursed when it comes to relationships .
--i LOVE to give give give .
--i wanna marry a pro footbal playa-- not for the $$ but for his body :)
--i party/club EVERY weekend !
--im overly confident .
--i only have 2 insecuruties .
--my mama wishes i was more tame .
--im the one person who will do that crazy shit you wouldnt think of doing .
--i had braces .
--im an only child of my mama's .
--my sister [by my daddy] name is faye .
--im tired of this...





-essence.

ear candy .

so i've been listening to some shit && i wanted to expose some amazing earcandy .
*their album : 'how to be a lady vl. 1" is amazing . its feminine yet rebellious && it makes you rethink the whole idea of 'being a lady' . next up..
*this is richgirl . i heard 'honeycomb' && now im tryna see who they are && shiiid . i'll put up more later ..... -essence.

zackery lamar neal && my birthday :)

1] zack is the best boyfriend i've had ! yessss !i said thee shit nobody wanted me to sayy . hehe :) uhm, a lil info about him wnt be too much...he's 21 && he works for the county [a legitimate job !]. he like to party && shit like me && he does lil things that makes me completely happy.

2] my birthday is june 14th && zack && i are going to atlanta to party && shit. i think he's gunna get me a tatt for my b.dayy :) && something else...*wink* hahahaahaha :)


-essence.

survey .

What's the first thing that pops into your head when you think of last summer?
--uhm, the lake && arguments .
Give me lyrics from the song you're listening to?
--gotta get you outta my system; i feel so alienated...
What is the last non-alcoholic beverage you had?
--uhm, orange juce !
Who was your last text from & what did it say?
--this dude i met at the club last night ; 'can i come see you'
Your ex says they never even liked you, you say?
--nigga, dnt show out !
Is your current girlfriend/boyfriend better than your old girlfriends/boyfriends?
--hell yes. all of them !
Do you have someone of the opposite sex you can tell everything to?
--definitely ; my boyfriend actually .
How about the same sex?
--yep !
Are you a fast typer?
--yes i am .
How do you dot your i's?
--like normal people do -- wid a dot !
What do you think of people who show off about their handwriting?
--its not even that serious .
Have you ever laughed at something that wasn't meant to be funny?
--yeahh ; ima trip im told .
Do people often mistake you for a different nationality?
--i used to be mistaken for asian && blk when i was younger .
Do you tan or burn when in the sun?
--tan !
Would you rather sleep with someone else, or alone?
--someone else [preferrably the person im with .]
Do you like sushi?
--its yummy !
What food do you find disgusting?
--chittlins ! ew !
What was the weather like on your birthday?
--hot as hell !
Ever kissed someone of the same sex?
--when i was drunk one time .
Are you laid-back?
--96% of thee time :)
Does it matter if your bf/gf smokes?
--my bf smokes ciggs ; hates dro .
Have you had any form of exercise today?
--if you consider sleeping a breathing exercise, then yes .
Do you get the trick in the song If u seek amy by Brittney Spears?
--i dnt even know what you're tlking about .
Did you know if you eat too many carrots, your skin can turn orange?
--really ? i doubt it .
What's your favorite color gummy bear?
--the clear one .
Your favorite thing to drink on a hot summer day?
--water !
Are you competitive?
--when i need to be .
Do you study for tests?
--nahh.
Who was the last person you sat beside at a restaurant?
--definitely dnt know !

hehe ;] lemme say .

1] breanne is the funniest bxtch in thee world ! scared as hell . i went up to the skool today &&& the bxtch bout shitted a damn brick. haha .

2] i wasted my night tonight && im not gunna do that again .

3] im working on a video blog so i gotta go !

-essence .

randoms.

okayy so this whole nicki minaj craze is annoying 1 i love her....been a fan since a while bbackk, but now people are finding out about her && tryna put 'minaj' on the end of their name. its just like the whole iPOD thin...now everybody's iGUCCI && iCute...stupid shit like that. omfg. i laugh at this shit...this is gettn badd but i hope not as bad as everyone overussing the word 'swagg'. ew!

i have an interview at jcpenny tomorro. i hope i get it. i know im excited now but as soon as get them hours && start going to work its gunna get annoying. IM NOT GUNNA QUIT THIS TIME ! haha.

im also on an apartment search, bc i somehow know imma get this job. so0o0 yeahh.

OH YEA! i got a boofriend! his name is zack && ironically he is like EVERYTHING i ever really wanted in a dude. oh yes ! he has dreads && a legitimate job && a bunch of tattoos ! oh gawd. not to mention he's sweet && he just compliments me in the middle of the day && shit. but he's street && of course i love that :) [more on him as things progress.]

i've been noticing that the older i get the prettier i get too.

&& on that note im outtie.

-essence.

police activity.

pkay, so def dnt deny what i do when it comes to the police? why? so this girl named kandice got her bellybutton pierced by my ex friend breanne summers. so i aint know this...all the while im piercing otha people's bellybuttons...so kandice parents call the police...breanne gets confronted && tellds the police i did her belly.

WTF?!

this comes from the breanne who swear she can fight && that she aint scared of nobody && nothing...&& that she hates snxtchz. YET, she sittn here telling lies to the pol;ice so she can save her own ass...this sounds a lil cross to me. that sounds like a snxtchn ass bxtch to me...exactly.


just had to let that out.

lets stay current.

single. single. single. im still single && im actually having a lot of fun, but i have this weird feeling that im gunna settle dwn for a minute soon..haha ;] i doubt that'll stop me from partying like hell..never that. haha.

been going to school && shit. got me thinkning bout the future && how naive i have been in the past...took the monroe out && hot a wayne piercing...haha ;] thats what imma call it cuz lil wayne made that hit hotter than what it was ;] yupyup. it actually looks very cute on me && i ddnt do it myself ;)

a lot of people didnt know i was pregnant...i was...for like 2 months. i lost the baby like 2 weeks ago. it hurt a lot...emotionally && physically, but i guess it was meant to happen...freedom isnt free. sadly.

i think im gunna go get me a tatt in a few minutes...haha ;]


-essence.

piercing = hustle

so i believe im goingg to start chargin people for my services.
so0o i figured i'd post my prices && shit so there's no confusion.

pricing for piercings

• TONGUE-$20
• LIP/ FACIAL-$25
• BELLYBUTTON-$15

*you must provide your own starter ring.

i stay in thomson, ga but im backk && forth b/w thomson && augusta ;]

call me [256.777.7741]

all my piercings :)

so0o i got my marlyn monroe piercingg yesterdayy...its madd cute daawg...&& day before yesterday i pierced my belly button :)

its cuuute huh? well thnkk you :)



hehehe:] that make 7 piercings: 2 on each ear, my tongue, my bellt, my monroe :)


-essence.

funny ; what not to do during sex :)

haha. its hilarious cuz i actually do have asthma && allergies :)

random;

im so0o0o0 sickk of this 'swag' shit. EVERYBODY DOESN'T HAVE SWAG! some people thinkk they do0o but umm..they're just swagga jackers. forreal. i mean everybody picks up their style from multiple sources, but most people who have to boast about their 'swag' have stolen it from someone who really has swag && dont boast about it..wow.

so0 i been pierving my homegirl's tongues...yup i can pierce. && despite what you may think, i d0 take percautions professional piercers take :) yupp. i think imma end up taking this as a side hustle :)

i feel like im gettn famous. im excited. not fam as in 'omg, everyone knows me!' but fame as in when someone sees me they're like ' i wanna be like her' ..yes!

urrgghh. post later.

growing pains;

yeahh. its been a while but a lot has happended.

i met shawn : wow. he's like my bestfriedn.he knows so0o much bout me that other people just cant see. &&+ he's amazing in bed :)

thomson is driving me up a fckn wall. so0 many hater. i swear, if i had a dollar...not even that...a penny for everytime a bxtch or nigga dwn there hated on me, i'd a rich son of a bxtch. daawg.

im taking my GED test on the 13th && i plan on going to college in atlanta. im looking at clayton state && i also been looking at FAMU. either way i wil get my nursing degree. im very ambitious && i've come to realize struggling only means you havent lost :)

but yeahh. just updating.


-essence.

0oh shiiiiiid ;;

so0o i moved out AGAIN. back in thomson && loving every minute of it :))


just wanted to updat yall on that shit daawg.


hahahaahaha..tryy me like i aint bout mines.
call it dope boy MAGIC.

hehe ;)

im feeling him like i feel [mary jane].

hahaha. yes....so0o he's pretty aggressive && i like that shid....it makes me giggle && it takes sumn special to make a girl [giggle.] && bxtchz laughind ISN'T giggling.



so imma see where dis goes ;))


-essence.

hahahaha ;) my advebture of 013109

hehehehe ;)

shoutouts to my bxtchz : sacoyia, breanne, alexis, && shenel.

okay so saturday was supposed to be tatt day :) okay so the first nigg who ws supposed to do my stars was str8 BULLSHITTING. so we rode all around town searchingg && either the price wasnt right for my simple stars or theyy was age tripping...so we end up at 1st amendment dwntwn && he said he could do it but not that night...now, understand, my ass spends money like a fckn retard so i knew by the end of the night my tatt moneyy would be gone fcknn wid my homegirls && shid...so i take a trip to thomson to see shan, drique [ex roomie] homeboy....HIS ASS WASNT THERE. urgh. so no tatt...BUT we ended up taking our highh and drunk asses to lincoln county where i saw CJ ;)

CJ is the nigg im going to prom wid && lemme tell you...i had a car full of bxtchz && he had a car full of niggs...haha ;) perfect. so me && jim chilling, but sum ppl had curfew && i had to take em home....urrrrghhh. so i figure hell, me && sacoyia will just roll backk to lincoln county after we drop the other bxtchz off...THIS NIGGA. CJ gets out of the car wid his other niggs at his cousin house && ends up having to go home cuz his mama stopped by there.....I WAS A MAD, UPSET BXTCH. dawwgg. so we end up driving 45 fckn minutes to washington-wilkes to chill wid his homeboys....hahahahahaah ;) they are thee fckn funniest niggs ever.

one of em is my homegirl's ex. that nigg was tryna holla att sacoyia && fron on my other homegirl like she was sweating his ass...ANYWAYS...so my drunk ass is crankingg this nigg up like hell && busting his lyingg as out...it was too funny. his friends was mad cool tho....me && sacoyia end up heading backk bout 6am...haha ;)

our asses CRASHED.

a weekend well worth it...&& my ass is backk to saving for a tatt again.

*note: i always call my homegirls 'bxtchz' cuz they are...BAD BXTCHZ. haha ;)

-essence.

haha :)

okayy, so i locked my keys in my car this morning && it took bout an hour to get it open...urgh. i felt superrr SLOW. haha ;) didnt get to skool till bout 10. crazyy.

tomorro is character day && i was tryna figure out how to be FAKE. haha ;)


short post.
ttyl.


essence.

okay so.

as time for college nears && people get more on my nerves than ever, i have decided to talk to like 5 ppl overall. crazyy cuz i love to socialize but its not even worth thee drama, ye digg...this in turn makes me closer to my MAMA.

i am getn my tatt in the next month ; saving money as we speak ! pretty excited bout thatt..haha..oh yea, and i got a prom date! hehe ;) as the relationships develops i'll tell more...

my damnn care is broke...AGAIN. urghh. its annoying but i guess imma have to carpool for thee time being...i dnt wanna but what choice do i have.

im in love wid that ciara songg 'never ever' so imma put it on here...haha. it makes me thinkk && everything she says is SO tru.

im goinngg to start my own talk show ! yes yu heard me right. once i get all thee kinks worked out i'll give details :)

so get moneyy && spend it && stop fckn wid people who aint about the same shit you are...it fcks wid your aura ;)


post later.

essence.

inauguration :)

okayy so im on my wayy to washington d.c right now...urghh. its cold as hell! but im exciteed... i cant wait to get there and feel the excitement from everyone else...&& beingg apart of history is even better. oh yes!

first african american prez. thats such a greatfeeling knowing thats ALL OF US goingg to the white house...its amazing. i love this feelingg.


for a random note, i thinkk when i get beckk imma get a tattoo...yupyup. i dunno of what prolly the memorial tattoo of my aunt....i miss her a lot...so i might do that or thee stars. mhm...


&& i wishh theyy had obama tongue rings...i get one of those to,,,hahaha. yup, I WOULD. im a lil crazyy i guess...



4 months && 6 days :) [graduation]

5 months && 1 dayy [college]

:)

so...kinda random..

i am here bxtchz.

yes i am.

skool goingg gravyy. only fckz wid few now so my intermost thoughts will be on this bxtch. teehee ;)

so im going to the inauguration && im pretty excited or what not cuz its history in the making! i love obama and taking a few days to support him is the least i can do.

i been realizing the immaturity of people...daaaawwgg. they be on myspace like every second checkingg to see what thee fck else i gotta say. DAMN. get a life. grow a garden. smoke a blunt.

me && ma dukes gett'n a tad bi closer. we talkk bout shit more so i guess im pretty happy bout that.

shiiiid. i only got 4 months && 9 days till graduation.....and 5 months and 4 days till i'll be in statesboro....&& my birthdy is in exactly 5 months.

countdown trxckz.


hehe ;)

adios.

period.

fck fakes
fck liars
fck ppl who THINK they doingg something
fck everybody who doubts me.


period.



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